Ultimate boredom killer

Flash mob anyone? Great way to pass the time. For those of you lucky enough to be in Southampton centre at 1pm yesterday, you would have witnessed quite a spectacle: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZyYJQ_MTIrA

Enjoy! More later ;)

Quick! I'll explain on the way!

OK!

By all means, please, read my last entry, but take note fair interwebber, that there is no longer nothing to talk about. I am of course referring to this!

News Report.

It seems that a certain female monkey, sorry girl, from somewhere called Barry Isle, has lightly toasted herself in a tanning salon. This apparently constitutes news.

Shocking, I'm sure.

She makes some extremely well educated points regarding how stupid she is, including that she was well aware that the salon was for over 16s only (she's 14), but pointed out that:

"Teenagers are going to push the boundaries. They are going to do things they should not do." 

Prolific.

I offer this in return (fully aware that I myself, am a teenager):

"Teenagers are going to push the boundaries. They are going to do things they should not do, and if anything bad happens as a result they bloody well deserve it".

The human race doesn't survive on the principle of "survival of the stupidest, because the cleverer ones look after them". If you're too much of a fool to use a tanning bed, under age, for FAR too long, then you can suffer for it. Who'd have guessed that a bloody sunbed could give you sunburn? I suppose she'll soon find out the hard way that drinking too much alcohol can kill you (before suing the alcohol companies for not physically taking the drink off her).

This situation seems to me to be akin to an asthmatic sneaking past warning signs and barging into an asbestos storage room, then moaning when their lungs start bubbling out their mouth as a pinky-red foam.

Put it another way, wouldn't a similar news report look like this:

Girl Breaks Leg Falling Off Cliff

A girl of 14 was hospitalised today with a severe fracture to her leg, after falling more than 30 ft from a cliff near Lyme Regis.

Annie Spoonacre was out for a walk with her friends when they decided to make their way to the cliff edge. Annie fell from the precipice after she slipped on the muddy grass along the side. "I just sort of, fell. It was very sudden. I was well shocked".

Her mother today commented that cliffs were "an extreme risk".

Annie acknowledged she was "partly responsible":

"I knew I wasn't supposed to go near the edge, but teenagers like to push boundaries. They are going to do things they should not do".

The cliff lies on land owned by Ernest Blitherington who said in an interview:

"It is a shame she ignored the warnings. There were thirty-three signs and a large fence between the path and the cliff edge. We were operating within the law".

Annie's mother is considering pressing charges. She commented on the dangers of cliffs and suggested stricter controls be put in place, such as twenty four hour armed guards and force fields. "I'm very concerned that children could go through the same experience as Annie. I was completely unaware that there are un-guarded cliffs".

It is expected that the matter of cliffs will be discussed in Parliament tomorrow. Some Health and Safety analysts have already suggested cliffs be outlawed completely.

Local ambulance staff said Annie was "lucky" and that in future she shouldn't behave like such a total prat.

Good Evening. Here is the news.

Strangely enough, on this most auspicious of nights (quoth a certain masked freedom fighter), I seem to have little to rant about.

Or chat about, generally. 

Certainly there are obvious things, like the weather, the holding deposit I've just sorted for a house, and worldly matters such as how Gordon Brown is still an angry Scottish primate with an IQ in double figures.

Sadly the above topics, I fear, are boring, boring, and obvious respectively, and thus do not lend themselves to riveting evening literature.

In light of this deficiency of dialect, I present instead a selection of photographs taken by me in moments of inspired boredom. Hope you like them :)

Oh also, I find this EXTREMELY unlikely, but please don't copy them without asking (copyright etc etc. blah blah snore snore sneeze yawn snore)

Two Grob Tutors at RAF Benson. Reminds me of the sheer awesomeness of flying.

Clouds spilling up out of a valley on La Gomera (canary islands)

Sunset from a mountaintop in Austria

A very ominous photo in my garden at home.

My favouristest photo. This is, inarguably, better than any of the postcards on sale at the tower. 

Hope those were mildly interesting. I haven't taken any proper photos in ages but I should really go back to it...

Also, for those of you interested in blogging yourself, this window I'm typing in is pretty hopeless for sorting out images in. Imagine trying to put up a collage whilst looking through a letter box.

One more short thing...

Thoughts go out to the families and friends of the Air Cadets killed on Thursday. Hopefully the impending investigation is successful, and flying remains an open (and truly amazing) experience as it always has been.

A piece of evening inspiration

Here's something from The World According to Clarkson (bought by an extremely thoughtful girlfriend):

"Boredom forces you to ring people you haven't seen for eighteen years and halfway through the conversation you remember why you left it so long. Boredom means you start to red not only mail-order catalogues but also the advertising inserts that fall on the floor. Boredom gives you half a mind to get a gun and go berserk in the local shopping centre, and you know where this is going. Eventually, boredom means you will take up golf."

All too true, it seems. I thought this little smidge of wisdom might provide some brain food for the bored-er people out there.

To be honest, this book seems a pretty good read for anyone who's bored, not-bored, happy, sad, literate, strange, or otherwise just wants some alternative amusement. For those less informed among you, it's simply a collection of rants from the ever-so-famous curly haired tall man of Top Gear fame (/infamy).

There seems to be an all too rare breed of humans who sit down and think a bit about the world and how it works, and Jeremy seems to be one of those people. Ok, fine, granted, in truth, and at the end of the day, (sub-clause cliché record broken?) I don't agree with everything he says. Light aircraft ARE fun, BMWs ARE for fat knobs who can't drive, and global warming WILL kill everyone (although I sometimes wonder if that's altogether a bad thing. If you've driven through Guildford in rush-hour, I guarantee you'll share that same occasional sentiment for mass genocide). But so what if he has different opinions? I'm not about to model myself after somebody else in a thoroughly clone-like manner, especially when one of the things I admire Clarkson for is his opinionation; HIS OWN opinions mind.

The point is, that here's a man who's all for freedom of speech, freedom to take-the-piss, and freedom to throw yourself head first out of a plane without some bloody health and safety "executive" telling you "you might die".

Sadly, reading through this I'm finding it hard to fully convey my meaning. I'll leave you with a short thought.

We're increasingly engaged in a society where idiots, chavs, and general social-degenerates are no longer killed off at a young age and removed from the gene pool. It's easy for stupid people to sail through life, blissfully unaware that they're making it thoroughly unpleasant for those who do, actually care. Far from saying you need to have an IQ of 130 to be socially acceptable, I'm pointing out that people who never stop to think about wider consequences, about the world as a whole, and about society (and what they're doing to it), don't deserve to be a part of it [gasps at harsh reality!]. Clarkson, like many other great speakers, isn't afraid to speak out against this sort of social liability, or to voice an actual opinion, on any number of matters, that so few people are even capable of FORMULATING. And whether or not you agree with him, you can't possibly deny that if everyone thought a little harder, maybe shouted a bit louder, and used their common sense a bit more, there'd be far less Health and Safety executives and the world would (probably) be a shinier place.

With more adrenalin.

And less hippies.

Ah well...

"Life is a comedy for those who think... and a tragedy for those who feel." Horace Walpole

!

My girlfriend has the CRAZIEST hamsters ever.

Do a google search for Roborovski (I think that's right) hamsters. They're tiny, speedy little buggers. Much amusement.

New Post!

Hey hey.

Please excuse my slight tardiness with this latest post- my laptop was getting a shiny new keyboard cover; which turned out to mean a shiny new keyboard, and trackpad as well. And they cleaned it! Lovely people at the Apple Store.

Speaking of which, here's a fairly worthless exercise.

Visit the Windows homepage, then the Apple homepage.

Done?

Noticed how they're (aside from colour) pretty much exactly the same layout? Yes folks, it seems that Microsoft can no longer even design a webpage without stealing ideas... For more evidence, check out the garish new Windows 7 (lovely name). They have these cool new features like a sort of... place where you have application icons and little "stack" like arrangements for folders... as I understand it. Except... Mac OS X has had that since the last version.

*Sigh*

I'm going to stop this. I'm never going to convince anyone just by typing over the web. Seriously, get to an Apple store and try one if you want and [SHUT UP!]

ok

ok.

Stop.

Better change the subject.

Tiffany the paper crane has had some more outings. She's sadly looking a bit worse for wear now. At any rate:

I did have one more photo, however Blogger seems to hate me now, and won't let me upload another one. The picture on the right shows our favourite paper project sitting proudly atop the front desk of a lecture theatre. We got many an odd look from other people but the important thing is it was FUN. And most of all, I don't think I'll forget it. That's what good time use is about- doing things you enjoy and won't forget!

Anyway, speaking of such things I'm off to watch Top Gear.